3 Reasons Andrew Schillinger took the heroin Pt 1
by belonginthedark
Summary: Andrew Schillinger OD'd in the hole and here are three reasons why,  according to me      Hard R- no sex but smooching and some coercion I suppose, Pairing is Beecher/ Andy but others will follow in later chapters
1. Chapter 1

**Four reasons Andy Schillinger OD'd**

Andrew Peter Schillinger had four things happen to him before he died and each was a reason he decided death was far preferable to life.

**REASON NUMBER ONE**

**I have been tempted on a least a couple of occasions to deep tongue him**

"_Did you hear?"_

"_What?"_

"_The Nazi fuck Schillinger's kid is coming to OZ"_

"_Aww sweet fucking family reunion"_

"_Yeah, 'cept the kids not going to gen pop, he's coming here, to Em City"_

A random conversation that Toby heard, but his mind(s) went into overdrive, all two of them; the evil one that had been planted in his head, mostly by his treatment in OZ, that he named 'Beecher' and the fine, upstanding lawyer, husband and father, who was Tobias. It was mostly an even split as to who controlled the logic but there were times (in matters of sex especially) where Beecher had the upper hand and Beecher had been planning to seduce Andy, while Tobias wasn't happy with the idea, his weak voice drifted off behind the heavy tones of Beecher.

Neither of him had a full plan in mind(s) but the decision to fuck Andy had been implicit…then Toby actually saw the kid, and kid was the word; a chubby cheeked cherub with shiny, dark eyes, a pouty little mouth and shiny dark hair.

Nothing like his old man, that's for damn sure, in the dark recesses of his mind Toby admitted that Vern was sexy in a raw way, overpowering and animalistic, his appeal in his overtly male sexuality but the boy was cute and cuddly, like a puppy dog. Toby had heard Vern had a thing for Shirley Bellinger because she had looked like the late Mrs Schillinger and looking at that little Andy, that was believable.

No wonder Vern was worried about this kid in prison, an angel faced teenager who had a major drug addiction….open season for any dealers to ask for all sorts of 'payment' Toby was finding his brain was working on such scenario's, a particularly vivid one, (a gift from Beecher) took root and Toby felt his dick stir in his pants.

As Beecher told Tobias not to be such a pussy, that Andy was a filthy little racist murderer and a junkie and deserved everything he got, Tobias saw a little boy without a father figure an uncaring grandfather and a sociopath for a brother, easily led and desperate for acceptance. While Beecher said to exploit that weakness Toby sided with Tobias, he couldn't .

His conversations with Andy proved he was as unbelievably naïve as the baby face led you to believe.

His every breath asked for someone to be kind to him, to accept him, to love him, a hug, for any display of care which is why he had probably gotten into smack in the first place, Toby and Tobias were all too familiar with it's soothing properties.

While Toby (s) claimed no expertise in the area (t) he (y) could almost swear that Andrew had never experimented with guys. He was quiet about sex anyway, no mention of his own conquests when Chris or Ryan had a bragging contest, in fact he had looked downright embarrassed at times, even when he watched Miss Sally he wasn't as lascivious as the other guys. He also seemed to be completely oblivious to what his father did to other inmates, _"__**Like we thought" **_Beecher's voice sneered in his head **"**_**pure as the driven**_**"**

Beecher was demanding that he dilute Andy's purity but Tobias, (with two sons of his own growing up without a father) cringed at the cold greedy lust Beecher's voice, Toby was also becoming alarmed of the rate Beecher controlled the cock, (t) he (y), eschewing the pictures of Genevieve in the head and replacing them with Chris, Ryan, Alvarez once, and even big daddy Vern himself (_aaargh! _Tobias yelled as he realized anew what OZ had done to him) Toby had always been quite free with his sexuality but it had always been with a degree of warmth, maybe not a girlfriend but at least a girl he liked as a friend, OZ had turned his sex drive into a cynical bastard, seeing potential sex partners as meat rather than people.

It had been pitiful, listening to Andy's whimpers and groans as he went cold turkey. Toby had gone through it himself, he was sure Andy could too but if he didn't help the kid then he'd never get any sleep and a lack of sleep could lead to him dropping the ball by getting snappish and any semblance of Vern was apt to push Andy away…deep down though Toby actually did feel pity for him, detoxing was hell.

He got down from his bunk and wet a towel, soothed Andy, held him through the shivers, generally was the parents that the kid had been deprived of in his short, sad, little life. When Andy fell asleep in his arms he laid him down gently (_just like when Gary had the flu, then gave it to Holly, who gave it to the baby, _Tobias reminisced) and covered him up. He heaved himself up onto his own bunk and tried to invoke Beecher by remembering all the vile things Vern had done to him, seemingly for amusement, and he clung onto how it felt the first time Vern's cock tore his flesh apart with it's blunt force, the shame when he felt himself cum and how Vern used to laugh. He desperately clung onto these images and begged Beecher to speak with his angry, hissing, manic nursery rhymes of hate and pain…anything to shut up Tobias' rationalizing;

_Maybe if his mother hadn't died…._

_**Vern was still Vern though and if that woman thought he was the right choice to breed with what makes you think she was any better a parent? She voluntarily married and fucked Vern, she got pregnant by him twice, how sane could the bitch be?….**_

_You're not being fair, Andy misses her, she must have been a good mother_

_**Yeah right, a mother who believes that the tone of someone's skin marks out their behavior**_

_Even so, Beecher, these are Andy's parents, not Andy. He's not much more than child_

_**You're gonna open the nature/nurture debate again are you, Tobias? That means that Gary will be an alcoholic or end up like baby Hitler down there..same circumstances…**_

_Better parents, my parents raised me properly. _

_**Yeah, fucking amazing job, look where we are tonight**_

_It's more complicated than that, I made my own mistakes, I wasn't brainwashed_

_**We're nothing like Harrison at all, a lawyer, married with kids, living in white collar enclave Broun Park..oh wait… You're a fucking idiot Tobias. The only difference here is the tax bracket, we were rich and the Schillinger's weren't. **_

_The Schillinger's raised their children to hate and fear people of color,_

_**You jumped into Vern's pod quick enough**_

_You can't use that as an example, Adebisi was threatening me_

_**And you never questioned how he didn't mess with Vern, you saw the black guy as a bigger threat. Admit it**_

Toby squeezed his eyes closed, trying to silence the cacophony in his head, eventually he slept.

Toby opened his eyes, it felt like he had only just closed them. The lights weren't on yet but the C.O from last night was chatting to the relief guy so it must be close to morning.

He listened for any indication that Andy was awake, silence. He jumped down and looked at the still form, the scratchy blanket pulled over his head, some silky, dark hair fanned over the pillow,

"Andy" Toby gave the shape a shake,

"Andy" he hissed, he shook the lump harder…nothing.

Just as Tobias was starting to worry, Andy's puffy faced emerged from under the covers with pale skin and bloodshot eyes,

"How you feeling?" he asked, crouching down

"Sore..my bones ache" Andy's voice sounded as scratchy as the blankets felt

"You want some water?"

Andy nodded, squeezing his eyes to re-focus "Uhumm" he nodded

Toby filled the cup and looked in the mirror, Beecher's eyes fell to the boy as he yanked the sheets back, Beecher's eyes moved, chilly blue, to Andy's rosebud lips, milky skin, his grubby t-shirt, his cutely ruffled hair, Beecher turned round and handed him the glass with a shark's smile "There you go, Andy"

Andrew smiled up and reached for the glass, draining it in one long gulp, handing it back to Beecher,

"Want some more?" Beecher asked, slyly. Tobias started to fret a little at the tone.

"Thanks, I can't believe you're being so nice after what my father did to you"

Beecher refilled the glass "You're not your father" he walked over to Andy and sat beside him "You're a totally different breed" he said brushing a stray strand of hair off of Andrew's forehead

The cynical eye of Beecher caught the dialation of Andy's pupils, the catch of breath and the tremble of his hand as he took the glass, keeping his hand on the glass, he slid his fingers over Andrew's and moved in for the kiss, gently pressing his lips to Andy's, barely touching, trying to judge the boy's reaction.

He felt Andy strain forward into the kiss and delighted in the hesitant shudder that trembled through the warm body he'd held tantalizingly close last night, except Tobias had held him and Tobias was no fun.

Beecher used his tongue to part Andrew's dry lips and groaned with pleasure, raising his hand to tangle it in the soft, dark mop. Andy met Beecher's tongue with his own but his hands stayed at his sides, he lifted them and then put them down again….unsure and awkward. It was the kind of slow, sensual kissing that he missed. The kind that was really a pre-amble, the tongue being Freudian in it's symbolism for what was going to happen soon.

Beecher was surprised at how good a kisser young Andy proved to be, tender and soft, teasing licks at the lips before his tongue seared deep. Fuck the hacks, fuck the plan Beecher wanted Andrew, wanted to get to his ass before Keller did, wanted to hold him tightly as he claimed his body.

The lights flew on overhead

"COUNT" came the yell, Andrew jumped back from his bed and the spell was broken

Beecher gave a wicked smile before departing, leaving Toby to deal with the consequences,

"You ok?" Toby asked, getting up, half fear crawling up his backbone

"Sure" Andy gave a wary, lopsided smile and pressed a chaste kiss to the older man's cheek, nothing more was said, but it didn't have to be.

Vern had his sons trained like his prags, once you learned what was expected of you, you sucked it up, did it and your life was easier.

On his way to the shower Toby smiled and gave the nod to Ryan and Chris.

Phase one was complete.


	2. Chapter 2

**REASON NUMBER TWO**

**Did he force himself on you**

**Vern like the power part of sex, so I let him think he did**

"_Nothing like college boys_" Chris thought with a smirk, with their undeveloped sense of danger and their 'experimenting' ways. Ok, so this one was younger than a college boy but that hadn't stopped Vern at Lardner, had it? He had seen Chris, wanted him, took him and made him his….Chris wanted Vern's son, he had met Hank once after Lardner and found him more physically appealing than Andy, Andy was too cutesy but there was a draw, Vern had passed on some of that hot of his…Chris smirked as he wondered if Vern had passed on any other attributes? Chris was far from a virgin in Lardner and that cock in his ass had felt big enough to make him cringe, must have been hell for Toby.

Chris closed his eyes briefly as he remembered being bent over the sink at Lardner, hands gripping cold porcelain, bracing himself as that thick 9 inches of Vern pounded him steady and slow, one pull almost to the tip, then a hard thrust forward making Chris rise up on his tiptoes, burning in the best way possible, too slow to make Chris cum but fast enough to make his body tingle

"Look up" Vern had breathed

"Mm?" Chris gasped

"Look up" Vern pulled Chris' face up to the mirror "Keep your eyes open, prag, I want you to see how much you like this"

Chris saw a sparkle in his eyes and color on his cheeks, not the face of someone hating being fucked, that was when he first admitted to himself that he liked guys, it wasn't just a few fumbles that made him cum, he truly liked guys as much as girls…but back to OZ and Andy's adorable kewpie doll mug which was gazing at Chris with frustration as he taught him how to wrestle, Vern and his stooges, ever watching jackal pack, Vern's eyes blazing ice blue fury as Chris helped Andrew up and got behind him, hands on his shoulder and on his wrist, holding him in a submissive position while Ryan and Toby looked on. With a smirk directly aimed at Vern he pinned Andrew on his back, making sure their eyes met and locked for a just too long…just like he had put on a show for Vern during Operation Toby, knowing Vern shared the same sexual appetites.

It worked out well; him and Vern. There was a mutual bisexuality in a home that forbade it and a father who was a figure of fear, where Vern saw his way out of that fear by being the biggest, baddest motherfucker in the place and replacing his father as a leader and keeping his power through subjection and humiliation, Chris saw his own freedom through lulling people into a false sense of security and then ending them, tricking them with their own blindspots, having his power being their last thought.

The thought of Toby kissing Andrew made Chris a little jealous if he was honest but he was gonna ask Toby to recount the tale while he was balls deep in him one night for kicks.

He could feel the tension between Toby and Vern's seed, the way his eyes would burn dark fire when Toby held him down, his back arching up a little more.

Chris watched it all with a studied eye, working out what he would need to say or do to get Andrew to bend over.

Vern had to leave his session before they did, which made this thing so damn perfect.

Buh-bye Vern, _yet another daddy who left me_,

Ryan and Toby made excuses about Cyril and Sister Pete respectively, leaving Andrew totally at Chris' tender mercies…Chris felt his blood sing in his veins. This was his home turf now, totally in his comfort zone, making everything suffused with lust and making that brainwashed little redneck think things that he would never admit.

Chris swung his wifebeater on his finger and rolled it into a ball, with a grin he tossed it at Andy.

"Hey" he ducked away with a giggle that still had an eerie, little boy sound to it. Toby had mentioned the immaturity; Fuel on the fire as far as Chris' cock was concerned, nothing sexier than prey that had no idea the predator was looking at the many ways into it's skin.

"So , you guys getting along again?" Andrew asked "After group?"

"Oh yeah" Chris retrieved his shirt but didn't put it back on "That's just me, man. I've got a temper. Ask your dad"

"Has he been a dick to _every_ prisoner?"

Chris bit back a sarcastic comment "Yup, you know how he is"

"Hmm," Andy looked over to the gym exit "Am'a start back to my pod"

"Am I that bad company?"

"No, no, it's just that.."

With a patented Keller smile, he slung his arm round Andrew and led him away towards Em City " Wanna see where Toby got to?"

Right on cue, Ryan swung round the corner at the top of the stairs" Hey, looking for Beecher?"

Chris nodded, smiling,

"He's talking to Said so probably best if we leave him alone to ponder life's mysteries"

"Aww" Chris faux pouted "Too bad, I'll just take Andy back to his pod to wait then"

With mutual sly smiles Ryan walked off to bug Gloria Nathan and Chris carried on with his plan. On the way back Chris looked over his shoulder to see Ryan give the 'all clear' sign that meant the storage closet was free and the hack on duty was paid to take a walk.

"Hang on a sec" Chris looked round "Get in this closet for a minute" he shoved the not-quite grown yet body into the ajar door and got the package of fake tits from his pocket "If anyone comes in we can say we were fucking around" he explained "Want some?" Chris held out his hand, enjoying the flitter that crossed Andrew's eyes

"No, I'm trying to keep control, like we said in group remember?" he said almost primly

"Right, right" Chris looked at the milk powder on the back of his hand "It's hard, I miss this more than the sex. You'll understand that right?" Chris turned that hypnotic gaze on Andrew, who (he was pleased to note) looked like a rabbit in headlights,

"What do you mean?" Andy blushed and stammered

"Well, you're a teenager. I remember how it is. Everything makes you hot, you'll go crazy the longer you're here. I went inside for the first time when I was 17, man, I gotta tell you. I was ready to put a slit in the fucking mattress, you can jerk off night and day" Chris leaned in close enough to smell Andy's scent, it was sorta like Vern's "but you start to crave the feel of arms round your body, nails on your back" he was near whispering to get the kid to lean closer "you know that feeling?"

Andy licked his lips "Sure"

With a molten lava glance, Chris sniffed the powder off of his hand and leaned against the wall, staggering a little, holding onto Andrew for support. He tried to imitate that feeling of the body singing it's own low key melody, he rested his full weight on the kid and pulled him down to the floor, laughing, "Sorry" he said, through the wide smile,

He squinted up at the confused look on the little-boy face above him as the ghost of Vern's voice thundered in Andy's head, no doubt lecturing on the disgusting immorality of faggots and gays and how tasting the flesh of your own sex was an affront to God and man…fucking hypocrite that Vern was. He should just admit he was bi, his protestations would be a lot more convincing if the guys he fucked looked effeminate or something.

The moment intensified as Chris saw a hesitant change in body language from Andrew, less rigid, eyes melting, his mind on how Beecher's tongue had felt, how it might be okay to do something he knew was bad because it felt so good, questioning his father. It was the same look on all the college boys' faces before they went somewhere dark and secluded with this guy they barely knew but that seemed to read their minds.

For a second, just a moment, Chris' mind swung to getting Vern's seed to kneel before him, to hold that head and let the hot mouth swallow his dick while he moved his hands down..grasping the neck and getting just the right hold before….nonononono.

Breaking the eye contact, Chris stood up, "Sorry" he breathed, inches from Andy's face "Stupid shit makes me horny"

"You go" he gestured to the door "I'll catch up. Go see Beecher"

"But I thought you needed me to be your alibi?"

_Aww this was too fucking easy _"Look, I'm gonna tell you something Andrew. Just there, I wanted to kiss you. Wanted to see if I could suck you and I wanted to fuck your ass. If you stay, I won't be able to control myself so you should go" Chris opened the door a crack and stepped back to the wall

Looking with hunted eyes, Andrew put his hand on the handle, hesitating,

Chris stood behind him, feeling Andrew's body coiled like a spring. Smoothly, Chris leant over the smaller body and closed the door with his hand, pushing his head against the soft hair and sighing "Mmmm", he put his other hand over the paler, one on the doorknob.

He let his mouth drag over the strands and let the sensation of his hot breath on Andrew's scalp make the boy woozy, he held the wrist tight and waited for the audible gasp that came from people in these moments, with a smile to himself, he turned the tense body round and let his eyes bore deep into Andrew's soul, pressing a kiss to his forehead, his cheek and then his lips.

Beecher had done a good job, no reluctance from the boy. Lips opened and tongue slid out, Chris deepened the kiss, grabbing Andrew's wrist again and pressing it to the bulge in his pants, showing him how to squeeze it right while he unzipped the kid's jeans, getting to his knees, Chris swallowed Andrew's erection, watching the sweet lips open in pleasure, the corruption of the innocent features as the instinct took over to fuck Chris' mouth.

He still looked nothing like Vern, he bet that was more likely with Hank, he had seemed to have a big dose of the old man in him, Andrew even made totally different noises, Vern grunted and panted whereas Andy made little moans and trying not to be too loud, a habit that probably came from sharing a bedroom with his brother.

Hands clutched Chris' shoulders, clenching and unclenching, kneading the flesh waiting for the last squeeze, for the cum.

A gasp issued from Andy as Chris felt the warm rush in his mouth, working not to swallow, catching it to spit in his hand, he let the flaccid cock fall from his lips and spat the mix of spunk and saliva into his hand.

He turned Andy to the shelves and bent him over one at hip height, using some of the mess on his middle finger to open Andrew up, feeling the hole clench and unclench. That unbreached muscle still so tight and new. With practiced fingers he found the prostate and noticed, with some humor, that Andy was hard again, "_nothing quite like college boys_" he thought once more. He felt a little regret at how inadequate the lube was going to be but it had to be now.

Smearing his cock and Andy's hole in gloop he pressed his dick to the entrance, thinking how perfect this was, Chris' first time with Vern was in a storage closet, it was bent over and Vern had used spit as a lube, the hot wash of cum that had run from Chris after Vern had finished was the same stuff that made the squirming little boy he was going to penetrate

Andrew hissed and then whimpered as Chris' dick burned a fiery path in his body, the whimper became a cry of pain, woeful and pleasured at the same time, first time breaching, unforgettable, the strongest wrong/right feeling you would ever have.

"Touch yourself" Chris hissed in his ear

Obediently, Andy's hand slid down and jacked himself, the tight ring of muscle gave a little more and the first two inches of cock slid inside. Chris tried to see Andrew's face, eyes closed and mouth still open, frowning and relaxing as his hand faltered on his dick, Chris guided him in a rhythm, enjoying popping the boy's cherry but missing being able to thrust

"Andy, Andy, Andy, you're so fucking tight" he groaned, running a hand over Andrew's back, pushing up the t-shirt and caressing the soft skin, sharp corner of a fingernail dragging on the knobs of his spine, unspoiled, smooth flesh, begging to be (_scratched, bitten, gouged, hurt, made to bleed_) used.

Another inch, some more give "You look so right there, made to be fucked"

A gasp as Andrew came again, his hand beating his cock fast as he milked the last few drops, his young body unclenched and all of Chris' cock was finally swallowed up.

Chris took a deep breath, delaying his own orgasm, riding the wave of euphoria but not giving in.

"Mmm, pretty baby" he put his hands on Andy's hips, pushing back a little and then sliding, a little further each time until he was moving freely in and out. He let visions of what Vern would do if he saw this cloud his thoughts. His precious Aryan seed being violated in a closet by his daddy's old playtoy. Sweat sprung out on Chris' back as part of his brain wished Vern would find out and punish him, like back in Lardner. Punishment for slutting around was harsh, Vern knew just how hard to fuck you so that you couldn't sit for a week but didn't need to got to the infirmary, Vern also knew that a prag with black eye and a monkey bite on their neck their size of a baseball coupled with another prisoner eating his dinner through a straw served as a good warning to others what happened to guys who touched the AB leader's private property.

",Ah, you're fucking amazing baby" Chris' calloused palms moved over the skin he had exposed and he held tight for the finale "You tasted like candy in my mouth" Chris' breath was hitching and his fingers were starting to leave bruises on the pale flesh "You're like a sugar high" Chris' breath caught as he filled Andrew with cum. It felt like he would never stop, the thrill of penetrating Vern's son, virgin son, who gave it up willingly to boot.

Heart pounding in time with his throbbing cock, eyes closed and looking to the heavens, he composed himself, Chris pulled out and stuffed his dick back into his pants and Andrew stood up, one side of his face swollen from being pressed against the shelf.

"You ok?" Chris asked, enjoying the flitter of memory (_musta been some kiss_)

"Yeah" Andy nodded, he seemed inclined to say more but there was a stealthy rap-rap-tap that meant it was time to go.

"There's O'Reily" Chris looked at the door, then Andy, who was looking at his feet, eyebrows knit together

"C'mere" Chris pulled him close to kiss him "That was special" he tilted Andrew's face up to his, "I'll see you later"

Chris left and joined Ryan round the corner, watching as Andrew emerged, gnawing on his thumbnail.

"And now to phase three" Chris smiled at Ryan


	3. Chapter 3

**REASON NUMBER THREE**

**My son is dead to me…my son is dead**

Vern knew what he wanted his youngest son to do, having him around was a constant source of anxiety and Vern couldn't afford that sort of weakness. Andy clearly wasn't old enough or smart enough to take care of himself, taking comfort from fucking Bitcher of all people and when his own blood, his own _father_ had offered him comfort he had attacked him!

Of course he hit Andy when Andy lashed out because it was a kid having a tantrum, hell, it was like any other family situation. Andy wanted to play with friends his dad didn't like and Vern said no, just like any loving father would do when he knew his son was in danger and what had Andy done? Bitched and whined, (like any normal teenager), and then Vern had reprimanded him (like any normal father) so he had criticized Vern's friends and beliefs…if he had stopped his bratty little hissy fit for a minute Vern would've explained that Vern was a grown man and had lived enough to make his own decisions and part of his duties as a father was to protect Andy until he was mature and grown enough to make his own but renouncing his father and his beliefs in front of the brotherhood was unacceptable, he must regain his power and so he hit Andy and it broke his heart the way it did to hit him as a child.

He knew Andy was softer than Hank, shy and sweet as a little boy. He bruised and sunburned so easily and was much happier sat in his mothers lap being kissed and petted like a lapdog than fighting or playing guns with Hank. Vern had sensed that weakness and knew what it meant for Andrew's future so he tried to toughen him up, tried to clear some of that cotton wool and glitter off his eyes.

All those nights he lay awake worrying in Lardner and this craphole, all his sacrifice, struggles and all the love and pride he felt for Andy and this was how he was repaid?

"Hello Andrew" Vern walked inside, looking at his boy, hunched up in a corner, blue from cold.

Part of Vern screaming to wrap the naked body in a blanket, to hold Andy to his own body to warm him, he walked over and sat beside him, he found his arm working on it's own, traitorously wrapping around his son, pulling him close (and for a real reason, why couldn't Andy see that? Unlike Bitcher and the other two, the attention Vern showed him was _real_, no selfish motives there) still angry at his arm that betrayed him Vern was doubly pissed when his head turned to kiss Andy on his forehead, he felt the slowly warming body (a body he had helped make and had watched appear like magic) shake with sobs, not the whiny crying that made Vern mad but wracking sobs from his soul.

For a moment, Vern stopped being the AB leader, the man that was feared and the ruiner of Beecher, Keller and countless others, for a moment he wasn't anyone other than a father, the kind he wished he could've been all Andy's life

He squeezed Andy's shoulder and pressed his lips to his hair, inhaling the smell that triggered memories of a chubby toddler taking his first steps and clapping his hands in joy, hearing that tiny voice murmur "Dada", Christmas day, birthday cakes, Martha's funeral, smashing the head of that fucking nigger, and in that moment Vern couldn't go through with it, he'd apologize to Beecher, kill Chris, threaten O'Reily anything it took just to keep his son.

Getting to his knees he spun Andrew around to face him, looking at the face (so like Martha's) about to spill his guts again, ask to be a family, but he frowned instead feeling a wave of nausea as he realized that Andy was tugging on Vern's pants, unzipping them and pulling out Vern's dick, he grabbed the pale wrist"What the fuck are you doing?"

"What you want" Andy said in a small voice "What Hank used to do, right?"

Vern was speechless, it looked alien and foreign, despite all the different body parts from awful people that Vern had had wrapped round his dick this was the worst, most disgusting. A perversion of all that was right, Andy's breath was warm as it caught before he swallowed the length of his father, his tongue working in a horribly educated way. Vern grabbed Andy by his hair and slammed him to the floor,

"Get off me" Numb with fear and pain and nausea Vern stormed to the door on legs that felt like stilts

Andy watched with tears running down his face, "Daddy, please, please don't go. I love you, please, _please, PLEASE!_"

Vern slammed the door, still frozen in shock

He walked off hearing the pain, sorrow and anguish filling his son's wails

"_I love you, Andrew. You're my little boy and I love you but you're safer dead_" he thought. With a heart that felt like a stone, eyes stinging with tears he couldn't shed, Vern handed the heroin to Lopresti

"See my kid gets this, wait til he calms down"

Lopresti nodded taking the tits and the money and tucking both into his pocket

As Vern started back to his cell with lead feet, so many thoughts all jumbled together in his mind, so many times he wanted to run back to Lopresti, to Andrew, to save him. He thought of Andy laying in that filthy, stone room, cold, lonely, hungry, thirsty, all of the things Vern was supposed to protect him from and he bit down on his fist til his knuckles bled. The lump in his throat felt like a boulder but he forced his feet one over the other, slow and steady. Vern knew what needed to be done, Andrew was a liability. Andy had always felt more pain as a child, bled more, he was sick more, cried longer, hugged harder and _needed_ so much more….well….in his own way, Vern reasoned, he had helped Andy more than anyone ever could.

Cell block B's gate loomed up, Vern took a breath to compose himself and blinked, wiping one tear that just wouldn't fuck off

"_There you go, son", _he thought as the gate was opened _"You'll never hurt again"_

**THE**** END**_  
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